Revolutionary wrote:It flows on the drake song "OVER"......
They think i forgot about them?NO, bitchin about how i left them yeah..shut the fuck up you bumps,take a dick and suck on it...You're all just a stunt, fake ass bitches with no guts. Trampoline dumb-dumbs with no brains, you all are DONE!
Raised and grew as a gangsta, my punchlines ain't gazed up, lazed or held up.
I got pungency certification, mental issue demonstration.
Frustrated about illumination coming to takeover STRIKE ORDERS.
Plan simple just roll with what god told us.
Back to the real topic now...How does it feel when your friends ain't calling?
Then after that expect you to be fine and ain't caring.
Fuck you fags im done.
Imma make you respect me for what you have done.
Look at me now...Sledgehammer on my right and 9mm on my left.
Hijackin your ass as soon as i get to the spot-light.
Propaganda my ass its played-out.
Nobody can determine the momentum so probably i'll just forgive 'em.
I'm on fire like fisher, brace yourselves im on it like him, ain't i?
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I liked what you had going on and the concept. But, it was hard to catch a flow. And I think you should end each line with a rhyme. For example:
Hijackin your ass as soon as i get to the spot-light. RHYME: SPOTLIGHT
Propaganda my ass its played-out. RHYME: PLAYED OUT
Nobody can determine the momentum so probably i'll just forgive 'em. RHYME: FORGIVE 'EM
I'm on fire like fisher, brace yourselves im on it like him, ain't i? RHYME: AINT I
None of the lines ended with a rhyme which is a problem. If you would've ended them with rhymes with that concept this would've been better. But, you're a beginner so it's not biggie I used to do the same
Overall (for a beginner) 7/10
