Spend Some Time

[Master Chief]

I just had to... As you can see from my recent threads I've been having a problem with love, if you may. So, I wrote this to my favorite and most relatable song at the moment, Spend Some Time. I just wanna say that writing this song has inspired me to record music so as of now I am gonna work towards getting some equipment

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQv8iNGfT7g

[Eminem]
If there's any bitches in this room, then there's something I gotta say
For all the fools who fell for the first... girl who comes their way
I've been down that road and now I'm back, sittin' on square one
Tryna pick myself up, where I started from

[Verse 1]
I never woulda thought that I'd see me outta control
Even though loneliness covered, clouded my soul
How could this hoe... ignore me? I got on my knees!
Asked for a hitchhike, she left me lost on the streets
I won't bother to plead, neither for your heart or the key
I'll walk away with dignity... it's a walk of defeat
All those times, I tried to show you that I really care
Have led me to this point, I'm feeling ill and yeah, kill me here!
Not willing to bare this anymore, I'm just heading to a wall
In my eyes, in your eyes I bet you see my several of flaws
Never said this all before, been busy staring at the cross
Thinking it'll get better so I just sat there and let it be resolved
...And nothing happened... this subject's tragic
...My love was passoniate... man, fuck this rapping

[Hook 1]
Spend some time with me, say that you'll be mine

[Hook 2]
I never I thought I'd fall
For you, not at all
Lord knows all my faults
And you are one of them

[Hook 1]
Spend some time with me, say that you'll be mine
(Spend some time with you? How I would love that, oooh)

[Verse 2]
I used to say I never met a girl like you before
I still think the same ever since we got a little room to talk
I used humor to amuse you, soon I knew that goofing off
Would just toon you off, now I don't know what to do at all
Just tryin' to pursue you more and I failed, Cupid watched
Asked him to shoot me or might as well remove my heart
Time would fly, I realized there was no future between us
Cryin' inside, no one noticed, my wounds were not bleeding
Wasn't my intention to get sex or you on my penis
We were way too young to meet up and screw on a weekend
I was told that if I didn't make a move, you would be taken
This guy began dating you, probably thinkin' "you should be naked"
I know this dude, I knew who he was just by looking at him
My man explained to me how he was a fucking crooked bandit
Flirting with his partner, I woulda hurt him, woulda fought him
Heard so many stories of this punk, I'm certainly astonished
My homey took the high road and just quit the crew they formed
Why though? I know he wanted to hit him TO the floor
Maybe, I'm jealous of him for being the goth, rocker type
The type you go for, the "shop at night in Hot Topic guy"
I shouldn't talk 'bout this cause I'm one to blame as well
Didn't play the game as well, he made moves, I prayed for help
Call me a stalker! call me obsessed!, fuck it, all is confessed
I DID feel dark and depressed but now I sleep when I fall in my bed!

[Hook 1]
Spend some time with me, say that you'll be mine

[Hook 2]
I never I thought I'd fall
For you, not at all
Lord knows all my faults
And you are one of them

[Hook 1]
Spend some time with me, say that you'll be mine
(Spend some time with you? How I would love that, oooh)

Feedback: viewtopic.php?f=24&t=112196

[Master Chief]

Yeah...

[classthe_king]

Oh shit, I didn't know that instrumental got released.

[Master Chief]

You're gonna write to it now, aren't you?

[classthe_king]

I was going to but it was pretty poorly put together so nah

[Maybe]

Personally, I found it to be sweet. I mean, it was reminiscent of the original, but the content was obviously more personal and emotional. I guess that's the difference between writing for yourself and writing for a wide audience.

I think it's pretty good from a writing standpoint, it's just not my cup of tea on a genre level. I like it, and I feel that it's well written, with a good structure, good flow, good content, etc.

I'd love to hear it recorded, though.

[Block]

I was surprised how well this was written, in all honesty. The second verse is really good. "The shop at night at hot topic type" lol. I laughed at that part for some reason.

It would be cool to see you record, bro. When you get your stuff and if you need help with anything, just PM me.

[Master Chief]

Thanks dudes.

I predict that I'll be getting my shit in 6 months or so, yeah I know. Long time. I'll make sure to learn from the experts like you guys

[Master Chief]

I feel like a dick for doing this but...






















bump.

[12characters]

I dig it

I mean, it still flows as nicely as the original. But, it seems like a completely different story. I like a lot of the rhymes and such and the chorus was just as catchy.

[Master Chief]

^ Thanks man

[Master Chief]

^^^^^^^^ UP.

[zedzero27]

I applaud you for putting you're feelings out there for others to read.

as someone who has gone through girl problems in the last two years of my life it's nice to see someone else's way of getting over the past, and expressing hurt feelings in general.

I really liked the first verse.
I connected to the content, almost related to it in a way.
it seemed to flow real well, and I can sense your "hurt", and the point that you were trying to get across. I enjoyed it this one!

the second verse is good too, I just didn't relate to it as much as the first.

hope you're not still letting this girl get to you, man

[Master Chief]

I forgot about this shit

^ Thanks man. I'm very, very glad that my 1st verse could connect with you. It makes writing this worthwile for me. Thanks again for the kind words and feedback