Shock Value

[WakeUpShow]

*when you get to the Deep Breath, rap as fast as possible.


Rum and Pepsi, when I'm stumblin' catch me
Give an attention whore, my extension cord
Smash a bottle on ya head, clutch the throttle till I'm dead
Start fights till the dawn and I wobble to the bed
[DEEP BREATH]
Punch a baby, Fuckin crazy
Rape a Dyke, Fake a fight
Kill a killer, Skill is iller
Lyric's godly, fear me prob'ly
I'm the best, try ta test
Rhyme for day, High in Haze
Drunk as shit, Punch a brick
Talk the shock, walk the block
tote a gat, bogus act
chew this dick, ya fluent prick
cause a scene, gauze and bleed
Stomp ya jerks, Pompous jerk
Lots to bring, but Stop to think
No Questions asked, COSH IS KING!!!!!!!!!!!



I know that 50% doesn't make sense, but that's basically the concept, just rhyming to rhyme and shock the reader haha enjoy.
http://forum.trshady.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=123858

[Wreck]

*when you get to the Deep Breath, rap as fast as possible.


Rum and Pepsi, when I'm stumblin' catch me
Give an attention whore, my extension cord
Smash a bottle on ya head, clutch the throttle till I'm dead
Start fights till the dawn and I wobble to the bed
[DEEP BREATH]
Punch a baby, Fuckin crazy
Rape a Dyke, Fake a fight
Kill a killer, Skill is iller
Lyric's godly, fear me prob'ly
I'm the best, try ta test
Rhyme for day, High in Haze
Drunk as shit, Punch a brick
Talk the shock, walk the block
tote a gat, bogus act
chew this dick, ya fluent prick
cause a scene, gauze and bleed
Stomp ya jerks, Pompous jerk
Lots to bring, but Stop to think
No Questions asked, COSH IS KING!!!!!!!!!!!



I know that 50% doesn't make sense, but that's basically the concept, just rhyming to rhyme and shock the reader haha enjoy.
http://forum.trshady.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=123858

I liked the flow in this, even though it was basic- I rapped it in my head, with a fast tempo to it.

Word of advice, try to write longer bars, and don't make the rhymes A-B, which means just simple, which this had elements of that.

Just keep improving bro.

[Man1x]

I would say your Deep Breath part is more like a list imo, that's how it feels cause the transitioning could be better. Unless you want the end of the other line to be the transition? If its that way, and I read it that way, it flows better but that just made the lines shorter. Good rhymes and flow, you should try to get better subject matter and increase the line. The latter isn't required, just improve the structure of the part before deep breath and it will work fine. Keep up the work bro!

Also, be appreciated for feed: http://forum.trshady.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=124299

[WakeUpShow]

*when you get to the Deep Breath, rap as fast as possible.


Rum and Pepsi, when I'm stumblin' catch me
Give an attention whore, my extension cord
Smash a bottle on ya head, clutch the throttle till I'm dead
Start fights till the dawn and I wobble to the bed
[DEEP BREATH]
Punch a baby, Fuckin crazy
Rape a Dyke, Fake a fight
Kill a killer, Skill is iller
Lyric's godly, fear me prob'ly
I'm the best, try ta test
Rhyme for day, High in Haze
Drunk as shit, Punch a brick
Talk the shock, walk the block
tote a gat, bogus act
chew this dick, ya fluent prick
cause a scene, gauze and bleed
Stomp ya jerks, Pompous jerk
Lots to bring, but Stop to think
No Questions asked, COSH IS KING!!!!!!!!!!!



I know that 50% doesn't make sense, but that's basically the concept, just rhyming to rhyme and shock the reader haha enjoy.
http://forum.trshady.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=123858

I liked the flow in this, even though it was basic- I rapped it in my head, with a fast tempo to it.

Word of advice, try to write longer bars, and don't make the rhymes A-B, which means just simple, which this had elements of that.

Just keep improving bro.

oh trust me i know haha, i actually got bored of trying complex schemes

[Mr.DGAF]

Reminds me of Underground - a piece strictly to rhyme. Random lines tied together loosely with great rhyming. Which is a good thing, if that is what you were going for, because the rhyming in this is great.