Bye Mary

[RainMan44]

LOF: viewtopic.php?f=24&t=147848
Beat: http://www.shadowville.com/122649/genre ... -your-mind



(Verse)
Shit I just might put the greenery down
To try and get my mind crystal clear, free from the foul
Thoughts pollutin' it, hard to put it in
Words but it seems lately I been off a screw, or shit
Maybe even two or three screws, I see through
My own bullshit, and not a damn thing seems cool
I used to depend on these mystical, medicinal J's
To get me lifted in space, escape from the bull-shit that I face
Fuck this road I'm travelin' through, time to be a better man
Do it for myself.....do it for my friends & fam
I said I can but it's up to me to prove it to myself
If I can't do that, then how the fuck can I excel
In the tougher tasks at hand I await, that's yet to come
When problems confront ONLY COWARDS decide to get up & run
So instead, I'd rather be well prepared for the next damn storm
And shit I don't even KNOW if this promise is one I can hold, but

(Chorus)
The time has come, try and free my, free my mind
Mary I gotta do it, this is my, this is my goodbye
But I'm sure we'll meet again somewhere down the road
Probably in the near future, 'cause my love for you I can't control

[RainMan44]

looking back on it just one day later, this is garbage..someone lock it lol

[Mr.DGAF]

I actually thought the rhyming on this was really nice. It took me a few reads to notice all of them from the first scheme, that was really nice. You're getting more refined with the schemes bruh, it was fun to read and you've always been pretty tight on the rhyme front. The last four bars were iffy for me, only part I wasn't feeling honestly.

[Mr.DGAF]

Yeah I thought Ego nailed this piece. Wait. It was raining lyrics. Had me saying Rain, man. RainMan44.

[Atone]

first few bars didn't rhyme and i almost stopped reading but, read it a 2nd time, all the way through and good thing i did cuz you had alot of good multi's in this, but like i said, first few bars didn't rhyme, other than that, this is pretty good

[RainMan44]

I was tryna go for the "greenery/free from dee...down/foul"..but yea i agree first couple bars were lazy as fuck lol

[EvryOnesACrtc]

Haha I liked the theme of this one. I've seen your other posts, though, and feel like you could've done wayyy better on this. You were kind of lacking in the rhymes dept. You should fix it up a bit and re-post it. I'd love to read a revised version of this cuz the topic is kinda fresh. We need more of that on this board. Good luck.