In the Air Verse

[WakeUpShow]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95_z3uo67Wg

My punches are crooked like a criminal with e.d.
the English language is my bitch, this shit is so easy
the beat conforms to my flow,
every producer alive is convinced I'm psycho.
My pen bleeds 16's and cums out punchlines,
My writing skills thrive under pressure, especially crunch-time.
Everybody and thing is addicted to doubting me,
even my pen takes time out to underestimate me.
That shit just builds me up and convinces me to get better,
To lyrically fuck your mind and consistently make you wetter.
These sweet fluid flows pour from this pitcher i call my brain like pink lemonade.
Never ask me for a feature because I'm known as a motherfucking Renegade.
Cosh has got this rap thing locked,
and if that falls apart I'd have this punk thing rocked.
Multis, flow, and wordplay are a major part of my repretoire,
and if you want beef, the punches will come out harder than Rocky 4.

[Innovation]

Was your first line inspired by "My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge"? I instantly thought of that when I read it.

I couldn't really flow with it. The punches weren't fantastic and I couldn't see any real multis contrary the opening line of your last bar.

Multis, flow, and wordplay are a major part of my repretoire

It was an ok verse overall. Try to be more complex in your next verse. Internal rhyming, multi syllable rhyming etc.

[WakeUpShow]

no i meant Criminal=Crook and then add e.d. like erectile dysfunction
and as for multis i had wetter better, renegade lemonade, punchline crunchtime, and a few others.

thank you for the feedback.

[Innovation]

More complex multis I mean. Try rhyming more than 2 syllables.

No problem, too. I like to give feedback.

[classthe_king]

You're going to need to leave feedback or Chambers will lock it

[WakeUpShow]

You're going to need to leave feedback or Chambers will lock it

what do you mean?

[Audi]

Sounds like something Royce would write.

[Devil'sAdvocate]

this is real dope man.