NO idea where i'm going with this.

[Gummybur]

viewtopic.php?f=24&t=146328&p=1946199#p1946199 LOF

Just felt like writing another shitty piece.


Let's tell the best to go fuck him self.
He's em-in-em anyway so it doesn't matter.
Talk about flipping a shit, couldn't flip a poo-poo platter.
Why's society like this, girls and guys, move your fuckin' leg.
That's nothing more than a paralyze and a fake peg.
So quit with the lies, lets continue all our shitty lives.
While others are getting paid millions to dive into water.
We deal with the rejects of humanity, lets set off a mortar.
"Hows your day?" "Good thanks, you?" "Well.."
I woke up, choked my self and jurked off.
Threw all my porn back up in the damn loft.
Crushed then snorted a pill, got naked.
Bowed down to it like its something sacred.
Find a french whore like the bitch in Taken.
She needed a Q-tip, said here bitch use this.
Stuck my cock right in her ear.
Came in her brain, doc said she's pregnant.
Who cares, she's a whore, finds dicks like shes got a sonar.
Oh, she ain't pregnant, now she's bi-polar.

Now really, bitch, how did your day actually go?

[Eedee]

You're right. That was shitty.

Just playing. That was random, dude. Funny, but random as hell. Rhymes were ehhh, simple and sometimes shit didn't even rhyme haha. I liked the extended roleplay you did after someone asked you how you were. You went on about random shit and some more random shit. It was funny. Just work on rhymes and writing to a beat.

You'll improve, no worries. I look forward to your future drops!

[Wreck]

http://forum.trshady.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=146328&p=1946199#p1946199 LOF

Just felt like writing another shitty piece.


Let's tell the best to go fuck him self.
He's em-in-em anyway so it doesn't matter.
Talk about flipping a shit, couldn't flip a poo-poo platter.
Why's society like this, girls and guys, move your fuckin' leg.
That's nothing more than a paralyze and a fake peg.
So quit with the lies, lets continue all our shitty lives.
While others are getting paid millions to dive into water.
We deal with the rejects of humanity, lets set off a mortar.
"Hows your day?" "Good thanks, you?" "Well.."
I woke up, choked my self and jurked off.
Threw all my porn back up in the damn loft.
Crushed then snorted a pill, got naked.
Bowed down to it like its something sacred.
Find a french whore like the bitch in Taken.
She needed a Q-tip, said here bitch use this.
Stuck my cock right in her ear.
Came in her brain, doc said she's pregnant.
Who cares, she's a whore, finds dicks like shes got a sonar.
Oh, she ain't pregnant, now she's bi-polar.

Now really, bitch, how did your day actually go?

You have a lot to work on my man. Some of this was funny, but some of the lines here didn't even rhyme, some didn't make sense, it was just like you were trying to be as funny as possible, which is fine if it's a silly piece, but I think you can do better man, I look forward to reading more from you, but you have to take a more serious approach to writing, I think you can do it, if you legitimately try.