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Little Introduction

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Little Introduction

Postby Spyder » Oct 23rd, '12, 05:16

Feedback

Lately I, been restin my eyes take a second testin the mic
But never for a moment losin my intentions to write,
Looks like next in the line aint spittin credible rhymes
Obviously don’t care if the text on this site is dead or alive.
I’m still sparrin, drill Sargent ready to kill targets, violent mission
Will’s starvin put you on a milk carton like a child’s missin,
Put my mark in, I’ve come to terms that the tides switchin
Until then I’ll put my initials on ya body call it ‘Y incision!!’
See I’ve always been blind when it comes to watchin my mouth
So think twice when your wishin we were talkin it out.
Fuck battlin, I’m done I think its time for kid to retire
Think you had enough bitchin to listen from Spyder,
But I’m still diss prone still get shit blown and hit home
Make you pick which bone, I grab and split like wishbones!!
Still insomniac, pilled black eyes… yeah still that guy
Just keep quiet I learned only the Silent Hills Have Eyes… damn
“so fuck any battle, I don’t wanna win I’m outty”
bury me in a glass coffin to see what this game became without me.


i know you hate that double exclamation shit ;)
still waitin on that lyrical rape, just a little warmup
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Re: Little Introduction

Postby Spyder » Oct 24th, '12, 04:22

its almost said to post here now, if your not posting in emulation and get LOF's noone feeds you :(
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Re: Little Introduction

Postby CrashBand » Nov 2nd, '12, 14:21

The rhyming was very good.

It didn't flow that well though. Lines just not matching up syllable wise whatsoever. The fifth line was too long and seemed like the 'violent mission' should be the start of the sixth.

The flow was really the only major drawback from the piece. Otherwise very nice rhyming and punchlines.

Was the Silent Hills have Eyes punch connected to the watch my mouth punch as well? If so, :y:
I'm not tryin to be rude, but I sincerely wanna fuck the taste out of your mouth
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Re: Little Introduction

Postby Spyder » Nov 2nd, '12, 17:13

thanks for the feed man, yeah this was something i just wrote in like 5, flow seems alright to me but i wrote it so why wouldnt it haha

and i didnt intend that but it could be haha, was more on the play of Silent Hill and Hills Have Eyes movies.
just saying if you shut up you can actually listen ya know?
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Re: Little Introduction

Postby CrashBand » Nov 3rd, '12, 01:14

Spyder wrote:thanks for the feed man, yeah this was something i just wrote in like 5, flow seems alright to me but i wrote it so why wouldnt it haha

and i didnt intend that but it could be haha, was more on the play of Silent Hill and Hills Have Eyes movies.
just saying if you shut up you can actually listen ya know?

Yeah I got that. I wondered if it was connected to the above one as well and it went over my head.

It'd be like an RA punch if you worked them in some way. Not too sure how.

Blind-watch my mouth / silent hills have eyes.
I'm not tryin to be rude, but I sincerely wanna fuck the taste out of your mouth
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Re: Little Introduction

Postby Spyder » Nov 7th, '12, 00:43

thanks for the feed man
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