All nighter

[Just Silver]

viewtopic.php?f=24&t=172600

I'm all ears but I ain't hearing half your shit
Must got some wax like that half assed rapper bitch
I'm straight raptor quick, you're Just packing dick
My talons rip through flesh like an Xmas gift
You're next to quit, I do this effortless
Best to have your next step on a cliff
And freefall, as I freestyle all the meanwhile with a mean style
You fall like a leaf pile, and decay and rot
I'm the fatal shot, pitcher perceived the box
In a hot spot knock em ballin out a lot,
Till they dead for a minute , counting up the spinach
Faced off at the scrimmage, I'm reloaded in an instant
Blitz over the fucking opposition , straight non-existent
I'll beat the horse till it's crying out for attention
Feminists and women , like we need that bitchin
A bitch is a bitch however you picture it
A pussy like an instrument just go bang that shit
Like a congo African then go smash again
Hulk fuck that shit masturbate nah I mastered it
Green skin, resemble the money faces
Sweating like a hundred races from penis ejaculation
I'm the cleanest to ever dirt you up
Six feet under doesn't matter if you're big enough

[shadyblogger]

Nice one

[Just Silver]

Thanks guy

[Never_Enough]

I like it. You should record too, though.

[Just Silver]

Maybe I will later on thanks guy

[Just Silver]

Bump

[Just Silver]

Last bump new project

[EvryOnesACrtc]

Okay, the feedback I gave you on your other drop applies here too. It's too random for my taste. A lot of the things you say, though, do sound pretty cool, like "Feminists and women...A bitch is a bitch however you picture it," but then it gets pointless after that and your structure falls apart.

My favorite lines are:
You're next to quit, I do this effortless
Best to have your next step on a cliff
And freefall, as I freestyle all the meanwhile with a mean style
You fall like a leaf pile, and decay and rot
I'm the fatal shot,

But then it quickly fell off in content. Put more time and thought into your raps. It seems like you just write down the first thing that comes into your head and believe that it's good enough. If it comes to you quick, you're not trying hard enough. So, spend days, weeks even, to construct a rap. You have nearly a dozen pieces on this page alone in the CW section. The object of the game isn't to put out as much material as you possibly can; it's to put out as much GREAT material as you possibly can.

You got feedback. Happy?

[Just Silver]

Yes Im happy lol

And thanks I know I can structure it better its just my style of rap comes out like that if I don't have a subject matter