ANOTHER WEED PIECE (snippet)

[tjb]

intro: "im sure everyones getting sick of these weed songs. well dont think of it as a song. think of it as an ode, or a dedication to my friend, my homegirl for life, mari-juana"

so here i am soon to the new day
glued to the tube till the high ends on tuesday
well goodbye, see i might just lose it
cuz this shits in slow motion like every single movement
boy this bud was pretty potent,
cuz its been a whole day and this feelings still cruising
im not totin just a toker, call me a hybrid
cuz this weeds what im fueled with,
and its what im gonna die with
everytime i buy it, i say goodbye to open eyelids
ever since the 1st time, best friend since i tried it
best friends for life, me and my pipe, out der grindin***

[Tash8]

pretty lame...and your similes were some of the worst I've ever seen.

im not totin just a toker, call me a hybrid
cuz this weeds what im fueled with,

like that.

if you're gonna do a weed piece you gotta at least make it original.

[Solace]

That was pretty...Lol.

[Just Silver]

Yea not so good

flow was off and word choice was meh

Dont lose hope keep at it

[tjb]

Yea not so good

flow was off and word choice was meh

Dont lose hope keep at it

yeah i realized this wasnt the greatest piece ever... far from it hhaha
but then WHY THE FUCK is the weakest one ive done recently the only to get feedback?

[BILI]

IDK know who long you been writting,if you`re a starter then its ok,but if you write for a long time,then you need to step your game son,flow was kinda off,rhymes werent anything impressive(nice if you just started,I saw some multies at least,which is dope for starter)

[Solace]

^He's been writing for more than you have I'm sure.

Not trying to hate but I've read a lot of your drops, and not commented 'cause I knew putting down your work makes me a dickhead and all. But you are really lacking.

[tjb]

^He's been writing for more than you have I'm sure.

Not trying to hate but I've read a lot of your drops, and not commented 'cause I knew putting down your work makes me a dickhead and all. But you are really lacking.

actually thanks for this. i think my problem is i stop writing for weeks at a time. then i hop back into it until i get sick of it. and i dont think i can step my game up until im a lot more consistent. i mean im only 15so nbd. but thanks for the honesty, id rather hav a critical feed that makes me wanna work harder then a non existant one

[Solace]

I totally get you on that, 'cept age isn't much of an excuse considering MC Anonymous and Coleon were (imo) the best on this site and Cole was 16 and Anonymous was 17 but even when they were 15 they were dope as fuckk.

I'm 15 too btw haha.

We all got a long time to learn.