What's your OCD?

[Rafael]

My hair actually.. Everything has to be perfectly equal, which is probably why I keep a buzzcut nowadays

[MistaVijilantee]

I have OCD/Anxiety, problems with Hyperactivety - this helps me creatively not socially haha - & Depersonalization, all actually diagnosed. I'm also suspected A.D.D but this may just be because of Depersonalization as it greatly hinders my concentration.
I can function as a normal human but I often have to interrupt my activities with compulsions & rituals.
Part of the reason I usually miss the bus for school is because I vigorously clean myself, and I have to do this a certain number of times, this can be me repeating the same action from 3 times to 21 etc.
I have to touch things over and over, make noises, repeat phrases.
I have obsessive thoughts, distrusting vivid images appear in my mind
I've been on various medications Prozac/Fluoxetine, Zoloft etc but these haven't helped, I am off them now
I've taken Ritalin twice, got it from a friend who has ADHD - because I thought it might help my concentration - I didn't talk as much as I usually do (I still did but I was calmer haha) - and that helped me greatly, my Doctor is considering it in fact.
Anyway, OCD is a cunt to live with and I feel for any fellow suffers.

That sucks ass man, I suffer from severe depersonalization/anxiety as well. I spend almost every other day convinced that I'm making everything and everybody up for the sake of my own consciousness' sanity. I highly doubt the legitimacy of this reality and I'm certain that I'm going to think too far and unravel this whole thing any day here and just blip myself out. I was put on Prozac and Zoloft too, as well as Zyprexa, Welbutrin and Propranolol. Like you I've been off of all pharmaceuticals for about a year and a half now, but natural psychonautics seem to either help tremendously, or make things 10x worse depending on the trip, so I've been experimenting in that department since 2011. Be careful with the ritalin, it's a nasty one. Have you found anything else that has helped?

I did briefly dabble in marijuana - at first because I was curious to try it at least once - but I discovered it calmed me down a bit, from then on I used it every few months - whenever it was offered for free - but one day I had about 6 cones, and I felt like I was dead.
This combined with Anxiety from "childhood trauma" - as my psychologist referred to it as - I believe might of triggered my Depersonalization, because while I was stoned, I couldn't feel anything at all.
In fact I was a bit brain dead.
There is a video of me that one of my friends took, which is about 30 mins of me saying "Is this even real life?" and all this other weird shit, and I said all this philosophical stuff, which was quite funny as well lol but anyway my point is this is the place where I pinpoint where it may of started.
Later on when it happened again, I put it down to the Prozac I was taking at the time, I was taken off that.
Got put on Zoloft - it was still happening.
On nothing - still happening.
The problem at this stage is because my profile is so complex they can't give a diagnosis which would explain my other problems, I have symptoms of Aspergers, Bipolar, ADHD, PTSD etc
What is your experience with Ritalin?

[Shpongle]

My music library, everything else is a mess lol I see some people in here suffer from anxiety like me, that shit is fuckin bad, one of the worst feeling you can have, it's been a while since my last panic/anxiety attack, i really don't wish that to anyone I had to stop using drugs also cause of this, haven't smoked weed since last September, all i do is have a couple of drink here and there and nothing else...it sucks really bad

[yoda you can call me]

My music library, everything else is a mess lol I see some people in here suffer from anxiety like me, that shit is fuckin bad, one of the worst feeling you can have, it's been a while since my last panic/anxiety attack, i really don't wish that to anyone I had to stop using drugs also cause of this, haven't smoked weed since last September, all i do is have a couple of drink here and there and nothing else...it sucks really bad

That's all i do now, the odd drink everynow and then..
Once i hit the drugs on the head a few years ago, a year had went by and i still had underlying issues that just wouldn't subside at all, so i finally succumbed to going to see a doctor, and he prescribed me some SSRI's called Citalopram, i took them for just over a year, plus i took up reading books again. and my condition considerably got better, i weaned myself off the SSRI's and i now feel good..
So if the anxiety is still dominating your life, maybe you should consider going down that route, if you haven't already that is
@Elision, that film i mentioned is an autobiographical piece about the director, his depersonalization was triggered by smoking weed, so maybe you may want to reconsider things
My nigga Vinnie Paz, is also a sufferer of that condition and he made a song last year that captures it perfectly

[Shpongle]

:b:
That's all i do now, the odd drink everynow and then..
Once i hit the drugs on the head a few years ago, a year had went by and i still had underlying issues that just wouldn't subside at all, so i finally succumbed to going to see a doctor, and he prescribed me some SSRI's called Citalopram, i took them for just over a year, plus i took up reading books again. and my condition considerably got better, i weaned myself off the SSRI's and i now feel good..
So if the anxiety is still dominating your life, maybe you should consider going down that route, if you haven't already that is

Yeah bro i can relate, i always hated prescription pills, i rarely ever take pills, not even for a damn headache lol but i had to go see my doctor at one point cause my anxiety was taking over my life completely, i was waking up during the night and panicking with my heart beating out of my chest, i was going crazy over this...i always refused to take benzos, people get addicted to it really bad and it's a pain to get off them if you take them for a long period of time, so my doctor prescribed me "Victan"(Ethyl loflazepate) which is a benzodiazepine derivative, the difference is that while Valium and Xanax or any other benzo gives you that "numb" effect for hours and sometimes the all day, Victan just helps you pass that "peak" of anxiety, all i take is half a pill when i feel a liltle more anxious just so that i don't get to that peak of panic/anxiety attacks...i feel so much better now i spend weeks sometimes even a month withouth taking anything

[StanBase]

Victan just helps you pass that "peak" of anxiety, all i take is half a pill when i feel a liltle more anxious just so that i don't get to that peak of panic/anxiety attacks...i feel so much better now i spend weeks sometimes even a month withouth taking anything

That's great!

[yoda you can call me]

Victan just helps you pass that "peak" of anxiety, all i take is half a pill when i feel a liltle more anxious just so that i don't get to that peak of panic/anxiety attacks...i feel so much better now i spend weeks sometimes even a month withouth taking anything

That's great!

Yes, that's great indeed

[Elision]

I've been perscribed 5mg hydrocodone (vicondin) but it doesn't really help my anxiety, because I'm always thinking it's slowing my heart rate down to the point that I'm gonna go into cardiac arrest. How do you avoid this feeling Shpongle?

one day I had about 6 cones, and I felt like I was dead.
This combined with Anxiety from "childhood trauma" - as my psychologist referred to it as - I believe might of triggered my Depersonalization, because while I was stoned, I couldn't feel anything at all.
In fact I was a bit brain dead.
There is a video of me that one of my friends took, which is about 30 mins of me saying "Is this even real life?" and all this other weird shit, and I said all this philosophical stuff

haha poor guy you just had your first bad trip alone and way too high they're necessary imo though, nothing teaches you more about yourself.

[Shpongle]

I've been perscribed 5mg hydrocodone (vicondin) but it doesn't really help my anxiety, because I'm always thinking it's slowing my heart rate down to the point that I'm gonna go into cardiac arrest. How do you avoid this feeling Shpongle?

I feel ya bro people with anxiety tend to over think situations, and that just makes it worse, the more you think about what can go wrong the more anxious you get and so on, it's a downward spiral...try to get yourself busy with something, me for instance my anxiety happens more at night when i'm home after work, when i stop for a minute, i start to overthink about stuff, i can now feel it coming so i always try to think about something else, or go play a video game, go watch a movie, listen to music, something to keep myself busy...my girlfriend helps me dealing with this also...but like a year ago my anxiety was so bad that i was 24/7 anxious, i would get dizzy like i was going to faint, couldn't sleep, was tired, was shacking all over my blood pressure was sky rocket so what help me back then was going to the doctor who prescribed those pills and i was back to my normal self two days later...still feel like that from time to time but you start to learn how to deal with it over time...best to luck to you bro and if you still smoke weed try to take a break just to see if it helps

[Elision]

I've been perscribed 5mg hydrocodone (vicondin) but it doesn't really help my anxiety, because I'm always thinking it's slowing my heart rate down to the point that I'm gonna go into cardiac arrest. How do you avoid this feeling Shpongle?

I feel ya bro people with anxiety tend to over think situations, and that just makes it worse, the more you think about what can go wrong the more anxious you get and so on, it's a downward spiral...try to get yourself busy with something, me for instance my anxiety happens more at night when i'm home after work, when i stop for a minute, i start to overthink about stuff, i can now feel it coming so i always try to think about something else, or go play a video game, go watch a movie, listen to music, something to keep myself busy...my girlfriend helps me dealing with this also...but like a year ago my anxiety was so bad that i was 24/7 anxious, i would get dizzy like i was going to faint, couldn't sleep, was tired, was shacking all over my blood pressure was sky rocket so what help me back then was going to the doctor who prescribed those pills and i was back to my normal self two days later...still feel like that from time to time but you start to learn how to deal with it over time...best to luck to you bro and if you still smoke weed try to take a break just to see if it helps

thanks for the response homie, and yeah i'm in the same boat you were last year, constantly light-headed/dizzy, chest hurts like crazy (to the point that i think my heart's gonna give out), trouble sleeping with lots of trembling and breathing trouble. also i didn't smoke from december - february and it just made things worse. hope this goes away some day

[Just Silver]

Idk if this makes sense but I feel more comfortable in a small mess than a completely clean room

[Shpongle]

thanks for the response homie, and yeah i'm in the same boat you were last year, constantly light-headed/dizzy, chest hurts like crazy (to the point that i think my heart's gonna give out), trouble sleeping with lots of trembling and breathing trouble. also i didn't smoke from december - february and it just made things worse. hope this goes away some day

No problem bro, i know how it feels..hope you get better, just keep yourself busy try not to overthink stuff(i know it's more easy to say it than do it) weed was making it worst for me, but it all depends on the person, everyone reacts differently...

[Eedee]

I can't set my alarm on nice round numbers. It always has to be like 3:07 or 5:49 or something.

[StanBase]

I can't set my alarm on nice round numbers. It always has to be like 3:07 or 5:49 or something.

I think that's the opposite for most people lol

[Devil'sAdvocate]

I can't set my alarm on nice round numbers. It always has to be like 3:07 or 5:49 or something.

I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE!

we bro's?