Trapped (an inner battle)

[TheHundred$]

I'm trapped in a box, ready to straight jump out like a jack in the box.
straight jack on the rocks, and two blunts then my straight jacket unlocks.
I think that i'm free, cause I can finally breathe but it's just these demons playing with me.
Quit waving at me, I see that your there, making me misbehave till i'm pulling my hair.
The musics playing but I can't distinguish the bass from the Snare,
I try to open my mouth but my face isn't there,
man life isn't fair how can I have everything I need but still feel bare,
how can I feel so deeply but not even care.
The devil 's wearing my soul, and tearing me whole ,
makes it easy for me to quit and opens a hole to his lair.

I'm feeling alone, so I look for the comfort.
Not answering my phone, why does the numb hurt.
Why is that I am such scum dirt, I hate it but I just can't seem to convert.
Sometimes I just wanna leave this place, who would miss me.
Grieving standing over my brothers grave, reminiscing
What would he think, seeing me close to the brink
He would probably tell me to get up, your more than you think
But every time I go to get up, I fall back and sink
So i just sit back and pour up a hard drink
fucking pussy, go ahead shrink.
Go low again, sulk in your skin, your weak
You'll never achieve what you want to achieve
you'll never become who your trying to be
Go ahead light up and you'll be good for the time being
but when it wears off don't come crying to me.

I wrote it to this beat: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Hh3tciRim0

It's not my best but I also typed as I was thinking it, it's real talk
Real emotions coming out. I hope you can tell what a dark place I am in.
Please give feedback, I am not going for perfect structure or anything and I realize there are problems but I just wanted to get what i needed to express out.

[Yah-hah]

Wat up homie. Yeah man was definitly feeling the multis. Its flowed very well in the beginnin especially. The straight jacket part was dope. Only thing I would have to say would be expanding your vocab and diversifying your words. But yo I completely understand when writing a piece like this vocab doesnt matter when your writing some true shit. Big props though man definitly have a great grasp for the multies. Looking forward to more

[TheHundred$]

Wat up homie. Yeah man was definitly feeling the multis. Its flowed very well in the beginnin especially. The straight jacket part was dope. Only thing I would have to say would be expanding your vocab and diversifying your words. But yo I completely understand when writing a piece like this vocab doesnt matter when your writing some true shit. Big props though man definitly have a great grasp for the multies. Looking forward to more

Thanks man I truly appreciate the feed, I would have gave you a better feed but your much more advanced than me and I wouldn't really know what to say quite yet. I am learning, this just came from emotions ya know?

[Yah-hah]

Yeah man I understand I aint trippin. Keep doin ya thing though homie

[Fa-Q]

Damn man, newcomers looking good. I liked a lot of the lines one especially being the music playing/beat/snare line. Its like the snare in a beat but also like a trap. Good shit man liked the piece a lot. Maybe you work on structure and making the lines a bit shorter for flow but good stuff.

On a side note who is the girl in your sig with the pretty eyes I know you got Mrs. Wilkinson-Baskett in your avatar

[TheHundred$]

Damn man, newcomers looking good. I liked a lot of the lines one especially being the music playing/beat/snare line. Its like the snare in a beat but also like a trap. Good shit man liked the piece a lot. Maybe you work on structure and making the lines a bit shorter for flow but good stuff.

On a side note who is the girl in your sig with the pretty eyes I know you got Mrs. Wilkinson-Baskett in your avatar

Thanks, yeah like I said I didn't really worry about structure and flow as much as story telling, in my head it flowed pretty well but I don't expect you to read it how I would rap it ya know? At the end it's suppose to go much faster.

as for my siggy... I dunno i just found a pic and was like.. DAMN... Someone told me it's some babyface chick.. like Katie Babyface or something like that. I dunno. I'm a sucker for blondes.