Beautiful FreeVerse (Eminem)

[ThomasJ]

Have you ever been in a place so dark that you can not see ahead
On the outside you look so happy but actually you're feeling dead
Instead of sharing your emotions you're keeping your feelings hid
You seem so fuckin' small and everyone around you seems so big
Even your own parents don't accept you so you have to wear a mask
You have to adapt to a new school,and new friends and it's a heavy task
Like you're a prisoner to society and you want to break the glass
And you can not,will not face the fact that your whole life is changing fast
Like you didn't catch the train,so I guess now you gotta run
But there's no point in tryin',you're helpless like a soldier without a gun
How many of your so called friends are gonna help you? Prolly none
And how long will your life be this way? Prolly til somebody comes
And puts you out your misery,but it didn't have to be this way
You could've asked for help,but you were too much of a G to say
That you fuckin' had a problem and confront it like a man,instead
They found you in your house,layin' in the kitchen dead

[ThomasJ]

Feed or bleed!

[neversnooze]

this was an emotional piece you have written. you kept the flow steady and didnt fall off. your multies were good. i could hear this on an eminem beautiful beat. the only thing you could have used was some metaphors like in eminem beautiful track.

8/10

[ThomasJ]

Thank you very much

[gutawafang]

I think it don't flow well. Lack of multis though I can see there are.

Some punches are very common.

However the feelings portrayed I sorta feel it, so for that it's thumbs up.

[ThomasJ]

I think it don't flow well. Lack of multis though I can see there are.

Some punches are very common.

However the feelings portrayed I sorta feel it, so for that it's thumbs up.

Thank you very much Guta
But I must note,this DOES flow,but you'd have to hear me rap it,so...

[BILI]

I kinda agree with Guta,your other drops were a better.Multies werent that good,some nice punces tho
Keep it up homie

[ThomasJ]

Thanks Bili

[classthe_king]

I'd go head to head with him if I HAD a mic,and that would end up in him giving me head

[ThomasJ]

I'd go head to head with him if I HAD a mic,and that would end up in him giving me head

Your existence =

[bennibus]

i like it, it's easy to relate to.