A Star Is Born FreeVerse

[ThomasJ]

Always had a dream about being the man
Provide the best shit for me and my fam
Grew up so poor,never seeing a grand
Please understand that I'm in need of change
Sneakers on my feet,old and torn apart
Could've won the race but was held from the start
But I'm a tough kid,with a strong heart
A sort of prodigy,a rap Mozart
I'ma make the whole world hear my voice
Mom I promise,you gon' hear my joy
And if ever I step on the stage
I'll know I was blessed from the day
Of my birth,my talent was no curse
I don't give a fuck if people gon' be hurt
By the pure fact that the hated has made it,
don't envy just congratulate him

Good flow,bad structure LOL

[ThomasJ]

Thanks for the feed guys!

[Yah-hah]

I've heard way better from you. You had a line after the first few barsthat doesn't fit. The rhymes were a bit simple and flow was decent. Seen way better but it was still good non the less

[ThomasJ]

I've heard way better from you. You had a line after the first few barsthat doesn't fit. The rhymes were a bit simple and flow was decent. Seen way better but it was still good non the less

Thanks for the honest feed.

[Solace]

Good way to end it and the first two couplets were okay. The rest was crap imo. No hate, just not one of your better pieces.

[ThomasJ]

Good way to end it and the first two couplets were okay. The rest was crap imo. No hate, just not one of your better pieces.

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?????



JK,Thanks for the feed.