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umm... hmm... lil sumn

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umm... hmm... lil sumn

Postby Ka0t1c » Nov 14th, '10, 22:15

no longer lyrics linger on in my spirit to sing along to so i think i'm sinkin under
i swear i'm drinkin water but where's the marijuana to share, don't bring the powder

wanna follow me there to when i was scarin the others like a nightmare outta Harry Potter
then carry onward, i will spare all you doubters, to the stairway i'm bound for

while you're prolly starin down the barrel of a gun
start your careless carol songs, they're not merry enough
i hear they're "unfun" (not a real word, but you know what i mean, right)

now bury your blunders or beware of the hunter
i'm not after the bears, i'm bout baring with monsters


http://forum.trshady.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=101917&p=1404972#p1404972
oh yeah... and thanks for nothing too
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Re: umm... hmm... lil sumn

Postby Sir_Machete' » Nov 18th, '10, 07:19

it's alright, sounds very freestyle like, structure was different
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Re: umm... hmm... lil sumn

Postby Ka0t1c » Nov 18th, '10, 21:31

haha, thanx for checking this out!
oh yeah... and thanks for nothing too
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Re: umm... hmm... lil sumn

Postby Wreck » Nov 18th, '10, 23:46

Nice multies, lines too long. If you're lines were a little less long, it would be an excellent flow. Good flow now. You have good potential. Keep working at it & practicing :D.

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Re: umm... hmm... lil sumn

Postby Ka0t1c » Nov 20th, '10, 01:29

alright, thanx for your opinion
oh yeah... and thanks for nothing too
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