After Dark

[Wreck]

Haven't posted here in awhile . Anyways........


Followed her home one night, then I hid myself behind a dumpster
Fuck a Bump & Grind, I'll come up this time behind the bitch & punch her
Slashed her wrists, I then grabbed this bitch & preceded to dropped her
They can't locate a witness, or find my gun- I hid it in my locker
Went to school the next morning & pretended like nothing happened
I was in the clear until kids noticed red stains on my jacket
Police asked me if I knew about a murder that happened last night
I felt like saying "Get off my back, I know nothing of that, you fucking asswipes."
I started thinking..... "What if they do have a case against me?
From that point on I joked to myself that Jason sent me
Recalled the night like a dream sequence, I hear her screaming
I tell myself I'm leaving, as I stop her kicks & pleading
Suffocated her, & ironically I can barely breath now
So I'm hoping that no one sees me, walks by, jumps to her side or screams loud
Screaming from my jail cell, but my pleads they never heard me
And this is my story, the end to my life, on Friday the 13th.

[Mr. Chambers]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[Wreck]

What are you talking about?

This is Creative Writing. When I used to come here you could post lines. How do I post a link of feedback?

[Wreck]

What are you talking about?

This is Creative Writing. When I used to come here you could post lines. How do I post a link of feedback?

you give a review to an other writer's song and u put the link here to show that you did..

I didn't make the rules.. it's just a new rule homie

Stupid rule. Anyways, how do I post a link of feedback bro?

[Wreck]

just reply to a topic in creative writing (try mine ) and put the link on here... that's called a link of feedback

yeah since that worked so well. fcuk this.

[Sam.]

Haven't posted here in awhile . Anyways........


Followed her home one night, then I hid myself behind a dumpster
Fuck a Bump & Grind, I'll come up this time behind the bitch & punch her
Slashed her wrists, I then grabbed this bitch & preceded to dropped her
They can't locate a witness, or find my gun- I hid it in my locker
.

this lines stand out rest were a lil weak compared to this.
good multis

[Wreck]

Haven't posted here in awhile . Anyways........


Followed her home one night, then I hid myself behind a dumpster
Fuck a Bump & Grind, I'll come up this time behind the bitch & punch her
Slashed her wrists, I then grabbed this bitch & preceded to dropped her
They can't locate a witness, or find my gun- I hid it in my locker
.

this lines stand out rest were a lil weak compared to this.
good multis

thank you sir .

btw, did you mean good multis for the whole verse or just the part you highlighted?

[Sam.]

Haven't posted here in awhile . Anyways........


Followed her home one night, then I hid myself behind a dumpster
Fuck a Bump & Grind, I'll come up this time behind the bitch & punch her
Slashed her wrists, I then grabbed this bitch & preceded to dropped her
They can't locate a witness, or find my gun- I hid it in my locker
.

this lines stand out rest were a lil weak compared to this.
good multis

thank you sir .

btw, did you mean good multis for the whole verse or just the part you highlighted?

yes the highlighted part obviously
and the rest had in bits and parts sorry i am not able to explain properly.

[classthe_king]

Are you an idiot lol, how hard is it to take the link of another thread and post it in this one
http://www.forum.trshady.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=102911

[Sam.]

Are you an idiot lol, how hard is it to take the link of another thread and post it in this one
http://www.forum.trshady.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=102911

icwatudidthar

[Audi]

It got progressively weaker but the beginning was pretty entertaining. The final twist was kind of weak but all in all the story was alright.

[Wreck]

Haven't posted here in awhile . Anyways........


Followed her home one night, then I hid myself behind a dumpster
Fuck a Bump & Grind, I'll come up this time behind the bitch & punch her
Slashed her wrists, I then grabbed this bitch & preceded to dropped her
They can't locate a witness, or find my gun- I hid it in my locker
.

this lines stand out rest were a lil weak compared to this.
good multis

thank you sir .

btw, did you mean good multis for the whole verse or just the part you highlighted?

yes the highlighted part obviously
and the rest had in bits and parts sorry i am not able to explain properly.[/quote]

yeah, it's all good bro. thx for the feed.