Lie To Me

[HipHopHead]

I fed MikeNUFC and Amadeo. Wrote in 20 minutes.

I like the beat and the chorus. I might scrap the verse and take the song another direction.

Beat: http://equalibrum.bandcamp.com/track/sometimes

(Chorus)
Why don't you lie to me? I don't wanna face reality
So lie to me, I'll just binge on all the fallacy
Lie to me and I'll dig my grave to sleep in
Lie to me, I feel happy when it's pretend

(Verse)
The message read "I love you too I promise"
No smiley face insurance to convince me that she's honest
I sent back "You're perfect, I couldn't ask for all this"
The translation: "I know you're bluffin bitch, watch me I'll call it"
"Awhh you're too sweet babe, but I'm tired and it's late"
Like I'll believe that you stupid bitch it's only eight
"Okay babe, well get some sleep, see you in the morning"
Wait an hour, private dialed her, listen for it
"Hello? Who's this? Mark is that you again?"
Fuck her, that dumb cunt, I wonder what she's done with him
I'm fuckin pissed, but who knows, maybe I'm wrong
Slam my phone shut, lay down, set the alarm
Who cares if I'm wrong, who cares if I'm right
I block out all the pain just to get through the night
Every thought on her face, every part of her life
I wish she'd lie to me better and spare me the sight


(Chorus)
Why don't you lie to me? I don't wanna face reality
So lie to me, I'll just binge on all the fallacy
Lie to me and I'll dig my grave to sleep in
Lie to me, I feel happy when it's pretend

(Bridge - Outro)
I wish you'd lie to me (lie to me better)
I wish you'd lie to me (lie to me better)
The days pass but I'm trapped in November
The flames gone but I scratch at the embers

[Satire]

Equalibrum is great

I don't usually judge flow in Creative Writing pieces because I never 'get it', but this went easy and smooth in my head and I like that.

Your style isn't as typical as some of the peeps I check out in this section. The concept is really well done as it switches between the phone conversation and the narrator's thoughts. I liked the narration and introspection of the lyrics. It gives a real cinematic feel to it.

Good piece

[HipHopHead]

Equalibrum is great

I don't usually judge flow in Creative Writing pieces because I never 'get it', but this went easy and smooth in my head and I like that.

Your style isn't as typical as some of the peeps I check out in this section. The concept is really well done as it switches between the phone conversation and the narrator's thoughts. I liked the narration and introspection of the lyrics. It gives a real cinematic feel to it.

Good piece

I'll probably end up scrappin this verse and take the chorus/beat a different, more creative, direction now that I re read and let it sink in.

Thanks bro Much appreciated