Dark verse

[mceddie]

this is a new short verse i wrote i might add to and record eventually.
thoughts/comments appreciated the flows wierd but it really fits the beat i wrote it too.


my mind to most, i can tell you is misunderstood
its not that it focuses on the bad, just chooses to ignore the good
I feed off negative energy, it gives me what i need
to live my life day by day, negatitivitys the blood i bleed
i gaurantee you wont find a more unfeeling scarier cranium
than that of this 20 year olds brain thats concealing a barrier of titanium
so lets see you try to get through to me, im hard headed
lets see you try to change me, when my minds got disregard embedded
faggot you dont get it, to me killing seems fun and enjoyable
thats why i double check shit to make sure my guns are all deplorable
fuck whats right, i do the opposite so tell me what's wrong
not YOUR fuckin problems, but the problems i can cause all lifelong


LOF: viewtopic.php?f=24&t=113390&p=1625576#p1625576

[Innovation]

Quite a good verse mate.

Not sure if it was intentional but you had some decent internal rhyming there. I saw a few multi's but if you had included more, I think it would have really pushed this verse up.

faggot you dont get it, to me killing seems fun and enjoyable
thats why i double check shit to make sure my guns are all deplorable

I liked that part.

Keep it up mate.

[mceddie]

Quite a good verse mate.

Not sure if it was intentional but you had some decent internal rhyming there. I saw a few multi's but if you had included more, I think it would have really pushed this verse up.

faggot you dont get it, to me killing seems fun and enjoyable
thats why i double check shit to make sure my guns are all deplorable

I liked that part.

Keep it up mate.

yeah most of the internal rhymes were intentional.

thanks for the feed! really appreciate it!