taken down

[WakeUpShow]

sdfadsfadsf

[WakeUpShow]

..pmub

[Eedee]

I love all the multi's in your lines, man.

"I'm not Perez Hilton, not a fan of all the drama
Scare you fags from the stage like Phantom of the Opera"

That part was simply amazing. Good job, man!

Feed me back on any of the following, please.

viewtopic.php?f=24&t=122108 (Rainy Day) <-- newest one
viewtopic.php?f=24&t=122090 (Out Of My Mind)
viewtopic.php?f=24&t=122046 (A single verse about depression)

[JamaicanPattlez]

INSTRUMENTAL (A MUST WITH THIS SONG): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGpnw9GWHrM

The Gin and Juice fighter, put some English in my punch (get it)
If you try to pick a tussel, I'll be finishing ya chumps
Like a business trip, I'll have you board with your work (hahaha)
A Modern King Arthur, pull the sword from the earth
I'm not Perez Hilton, not a fan of all the drama
Scare you fags from the stage like Phantom of the Opera
Pull the wool over your eyes when I pack a pistol, BLAM!
If you're a wolf in sheep's clothing you're the sacraficial lamb!

http://forum.trshady.com/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=121702

Last two bars... nice job!

[WakeUpShow]

thanks for the feed guys! and Edee, I'll feed a bit later.

[VenomBlackViper]

This was dope, punches & rhyming were on point. My favorite was

"Pull the wool over your eyes when I pack a pistol, BLAM!
If you're a wolf in sheep's clothing you're the sacraficial lamb!"

I have no real criticism for this, I enjoyed it.

[ArsheyHaq]

Usually I would complain that this was too short, but you packed a lot of punch into this one Every line was dope one after another, each better than the last. These last 4 lines were just awesome, mainly because you managed to utilize professional-type multies along with hard-hitting punchlines (which is very hard to do, but you've been getting extremely good at it lately):

"I'm not Perez Hilton, not a fan of all the drama
Scare you fags from the stage like Phantom of the Opera
Pull the wool over your eyes when I pack a pistol, BLAM!
If you're a wolf in sheep's clothing you're the sacraficial lamb!"

BUT for this line:

"The Gin and Juice fighter, put some English in my punch (get it)"

No, I don't get it hehhe I'm not much of a drinker (never had a lick), so maybe that's why it's going over my head...Can you elaborate further?

[Ka0t1c]

i enjoyed it from beginning to the end, those lyrics are clever, love the multies and punches

[WakeUpShow]

Usually I would complain that this was too short, but you packed a lot of punch into this one Every line was dope one after another, each better than the last. These last 4 lines were just awesome, mainly because you managed to utilize professional-type multies along with hard-hitting punchlines (which is very hard to do, but you've been getting extremely good at it lately):

"I'm not Perez Hilton, not a fan of all the drama
Scare you fags from the stage like Phantom of the Opera
Pull the wool over your eyes when I pack a pistol, BLAM!
If you're a wolf in sheep's clothing you're the sacraficial lamb!"

BUT for this line:

"The Gin and Juice fighter, put some English in my punch (get it)"

No, I don't get it hehhe I'm not much of a drinker (never had a lick), so maybe that's why it's going over my head...Can you elaborate further?

well to put english in something means extra force. Gin is an english liquor and punch is another name for juice. thanks alot for the feed man i appreciate it. And i think im going to take this down because i want those last two bars for my horsemen verse