Crazy Afternoons

[JamaicanPattlez]

He's something I just wrote!

The lil' homie slowly shows me that all his words are phony,
So he's lonely trying to phone me, and I think he wants to blow me,
I had enough of the stuff so I called his girl up,
And she's steady trying to get me to her world, fuck!
I said "What's with you and dude, he's busy acting like a fool",
"He's jacking on my broom, and now he wants to blacken it too!"
"He did that with me too, and went and shat on my boots!
You better fuckin' run when he starts swinging at you!"
Just then he starts peeing on my European sheets,
He got my seat, my feet and my entire fuckin' cheek!
I shoved him to the floor, it shook him to the core,
"Are you really gonna lose shit over a stupid whore!?"
"I'm here!" "Shut up slut, you've caused too much chaos!"
I knew she could hear it too, he got mad, and well, it paid off!
He stood up, blew up, and started screaming "You suck!"
He got back at lewd mutt, I haven't seen her in two months.

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Comments? :

[Eedee]

I got shades of Seduction, 3 AM and WTP haha... Nice work man. I liked it all!

[JamaicanPattlez]

I got shades of Seduction, 3 AM and WTP haha... Nice work man. I liked it all!

LOL WTP, nice! Thanks man! I wanted to see if I could pull a Slim Shady-style of writing!

[Man1x]

Nice work, I love the multis but you should try to adapt out of the shadow of Eminem and create your new style or an alternate style or an expansion on the shady style.

[JamaicanPattlez]

Nice work, I love the multis but you should try to adapt out of the shadow of Eminem and create your new style or an alternate style or an expansion on the shady style.

Yeah, I'm trying to make my own expansion of it like Hopsin does, but I'm not sure how to.

[FlintSpark]

I said "What's with you and dude, he's busy acting like a fool",
"He's jacking on my broom, and now he wants to blacken it too!"

Just then he starts peeing on my European sheets,
He got my seat, my feet and my entire fuckin' cheek!

"I'm here!" "Shut up slut, you've caused too much chaos!"
I knew she could hear it too, he got mad, and well, it paid off!
He stood up, blew up, and started screaming "You suck!"
He got back at lewd mutt, I haven't seen her in two months.

With that I can see you definitely sounding like the slim shady lp era where it was story telling, disgusting and funny at the same time. The blacken it too part was especially fitting to this description if I am imagining it right. Either way good piece, I especially liked the last two lines rhyming, and continue your work. Pretty funny.

[JamaicanPattlez]

Thanks you guys! I actually want to put up a Martians vs Goblins piece up very soon! I appreciate the feedback.