Halfway- Track 11 Ft Eminem

[J.R.]

feed- viewtopic.php?f=24&t=62071

(Not true- Disclaimer lmao)

Hey yo fuck an intro and a chorus this is my album's halfway mark,
We've covered porn, bitches, pills, and snapping heart's,
And now we begin, the second chapter of my terrible life story,
but first a better story for you, that involves halfway, it's called "glory"
See it begins like this, A little child was walking up and down a street,
she was like 5 and I decided to take her aside and plant her with my seed,
on her 6th birthday, her pussy exploded, so I shot the hospital up,
Decided to only unload one clip, oops i reloaded, shot up the scrubs,
Most of you people, might think I'm a little bit psycho and just a little out of wack,
comparin me to hopsin, saying we both got dope writes bro, well fuck I ain't black,
And I'm not about to pull out and single a whole race like eminem,
But I am gonna pull aside children, and put some sins in them.

See children, drugs are bahhhd (c'mon)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (ask him man)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (that's right)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to drugs (that's right)
So you don't act like everyone else does (uh-huh)
Then there's really nothin else to say (sing along)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?

Oh shit, I forgot where I left off, so let's rape another little girl,
Nah, fuck that, let's let her go so I can stick my penis inside of a squirrel,
And that will be so fun, and you might call me a queer,
But I'm truly homophobic so fags, don't approach me in sears,
and I'm not another rags to riches story, never claim to be,
I'm just that average living motherfucker, living in the D,
and I'm not savage, My rhymes are just a little fucked up,
Maybe the aspirin, will cause my penis to erupt,
after all, I only took 80,000 and that's not too bad,
all I hear is shouting, and the neighbor getting fucked by her dad,
and this is not suppose to be taken serious, don't get the wrong Idea,
I'm not gangster, I'm not gonna act delirious or piss on a chair from ikea,
So before you fuckers get furious, let's see if I can bust a nut,
And If I do, that'll be a new meaning to "B.Nut"

See children, drugs are bahhhd (c'mon)
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (ask him man)
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (that's right)
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)
So kids say no to drugs (that's right)
So you don't act like everyone else does (uh-huh)
Then there's really nothin else to say (sing along)
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?

(Outro- mini verse)
Yeah, welll....your dad and mom can suck my motherfucking dick,
after I rape their daughter, and poke her with a stick,
And this isn't true, my mind is just a little sick,
so on that note, let's go out with a little wish,
Let's kill momma, and kill daddy, and give em a little kiss,
then I'll rape you little girl, and you can suck my dick!

[Ka0t1c]

i would never buy your album with songs like this

[Solace]

i would never buy your album with songs like this

This. You need work on everything. Including being yourself and not trying to be Slim Shady. None of the stuff you're saying is true.

No one has compared you to Hopsin because you're both dope
Since when was it cool to say you had sex and impregnated a 5 year old girl
You're 16 and I doubt you have shit on your record, stealing a gum pack maybe
You don't have a gun and you're not shooting people up
Stick your penis inside of a squirrel?
You took 80, 000 aspirins..And then say that will cause your penis to blow up? The fuck?

You're not saying things hardcore, you're just putting a bunch of stupid nonsensical events together and putting "dick" "fuck" "shit" wherever makes sense in the sentence. This isn't shock value, this is stupidity. Come on dude, this is all garbage. What are you trying to get at? That you're some hardcorez $erialzssss kilar whoo juss dunt gif a fck? This is the first thing I've read by you and I'm honestly terribly disappointed.

*Waits for my hardcore diss that will rip me to shreds.

[J.R.]

i would never buy your album with songs like this

This. You need work on everything. Including being yourself and not trying to be Slim Shady. None of the stuff you're saying is true.

No one has compared you to Hopsin because you're both dope
Since when was it cool to say you had sex and impregnated a 5 year old girl
You're 16 and I doubt you have shit on your record, stealing a gum pack maybe
You don't have a gun and you're not shooting people up
Stick your penis inside of a squirrel?
You took 80, 000 aspirins..And then say that will cause your penis to blow up? The fuck?

You're not saying things hardcore, you're just putting a bunch of stupid nonsensical events together and putting "dick" "fuck" "shit" wherever makes sense in the sentence. This isn't shock value, this is stupidity. Come on dude, this is all garbage. What are you trying to get at? That you're some hardcorez $erialzssss kilar whoo juss dunt gif a fck? This is the first thing I've read by you and I'm honestly terribly disappointed.

*Waits for my hardcore diss that will rip me to shreds.

It was a joke track... Seriously, ask anyone, all I ever write is emotional shit........and this wasn't written from my point of view, hence the eminem chorus...v.v

go check out other shit. THats not this or "fuck em all" .

[Solace]

For a joke track this wasn't funny at all. Was saying "Yeah I was 6 and I fucked a 5 year old hahahaha" hilarious or something? It's neither offensive nor funny. It's pointless. And this isn't a track...This is a piece. If you're going to put something like this in your written album, what's the point? No one will like it. It's a waste of time and space. If everything you write is emotional shit, then throwing this is would mess up the balance. You're not building a proper album. Anyway, aside from your content you aren't pulling off this style properly at all. You have a lot of work to do with your flow and syllable count. You're supposed to write to a beat, I'm pretty sure you don't do that and if you do then you're off beat. Reading it didn't feel like a rap/poem. It felt like a paragraph chopped up. But I'll peep your progress in a couple weeks. Off to read Maybe's piece, I know I'm in for a treat.

[J.R.]

*brings another artist up as if I should act like him* ??? PROFIT.


No, for real, I'll work on. I do this shit on no beat, I just fuck around. v.v and it's a written album, doesn't mean shit. when I get my mic I won't do this, ill write all new .

[Solace]

I wasn't bringing up Maybe so you could act like him, I really did go and read his piece. And honestly, I'd rather have you act like Maybe than Eminem, but you'd be shit at that style. All work means something. If you were actually into writing you'd have the passion to make something great. Written albums should be taken as serious as any album, as it would spark the interest of someone who actually enjoys reading it. A lot of people on TR are simply like that, and it's why they stay in CW and read even if they don't post often. And when you get your what, your xbox live mic and fuck around with your friend on Fruity Loops? It won't make a difference lol. I might seem a lil harsh, but it's only 'cause you're heading in a wrong direction with all of this.

[J.R.]

Oh? suggest one?

My plan was to write fresh new emotional pieces and practice using this album, with a few fuck around tracks such as this to cool down.

[Solace]

Suggest one what?

[J.R.]

direction .

[Solace]

A direction is a way to go, not a place to go. I can't name you a direction, and I can't say north, south, east or west. You had a username with Shady in it, your signature and avatar are both Eminem. So I can safely assume you're a guy who bumps Eminem like he's the best rapper alive and the only one worth listening to. Other than that you probably listen to 50 Cent, Busta Rhymes, Xzibit, Proof, D12, other Eminem affiliates. Influences are important, so that doesn't cut it (correct me if I'm wrong though, I don't know much about your music taste...). Be creative and stop trying to sound like Eminem in your head.

[J.R.]

I listen to hopsin, tech n9ne, yelawolf, joe budden, game, dre, jay z, etc.

[Solace]

Yeah exactly, Eminem affiliates. Expand.

[J.R.]

Yeah exactly, Eminem affiliates. Expand.

Tech, Jay, And Hopsin= Not on his label, and I said Etc, I really don't have time to expand on the subject...

[Solace]

Expand your music taste not the subject. I didn't say elaborate.

Since when did affiliates = on said person's label. Pay attention to what you read. Jay-Z and Eminem have a track together, have done a concert together, have mutual friends and have hung out I'm sure. They are affiliates. Tech N9ne bumps Eminem, thinks Eminem is dope, has been together on a track (though none of them recorded together), and wanted Eminem on All 6's and 7's. Affiliate. Hopsin has never personally met Eminem, but is an exact clone of Eminem pre 2001. Eminem is one of his main influences. He has Eminem and D12 posters in his bedroom. His music and gimmicks are very similar to Slim Shady. Anyway, other artists you said were clearly Eminem affiliates. Game? Dre? Budden? Yelawolf? Come on.

And thus, you need to expand your music taste because none of these guys are bringing anything special.