Love Crimes (feat. Sam. & Zabe)

[RainMan44]

Hmm... this is interesting. First off, let me say I'm feeling the chorus

Zabe, you started strong, and I enjoyed the first couple bars a lot. From what I understood, you killed your gf's dad in the verse, yes? Quite funny haha

Sam, to me you started off kind of weak but picked it up about 4-6 bars in, and, from there on it was a killer verse. At one point you rhymed "sun-rise" over 10 times, good shit


Eminememy, your verse wasn't bad, but you could work on your multies. I didn't find any end rhymes with these lines.

"Now heres a story of mine, we all know GameTheory
Love him to death but he isn’t the same guy as Cream
So he’s now hanged on a tree, I know his fate is funny."


BUT, I see you used multies here.

"But we all share this creepy dream, lucky I didn’t shred you
Don’t know where I’d fled to, blood and shit draws feds, dude
What would that have led too?"

So this shows you do have the ability to write multies, I guess it was a personal decision for some reason not too. But hey, multies aren't the only thing that matters. Your verse flowed well


Overall, a pretty solid drop. Good job guys, keep at it

[Man1x]

Hmm... this is interesting. First off, let me say I'm feeling the chorus

Zabe, you started strong, and I enjoyed the first couple bars a lot. From what I understood, you killed your gf's dad in the verse, yes? Quite funny haha

Sam, to me you started off kind of weak but picked it up about 4-6 bars in, and, from there on it was a killer verse. At one point you rhymed "sun-rise" over 10 times, good shit


Eminememy, your verse wasn't bad, but you could work on your multies. I didn't find any end rhymes with these lines.

"Now heres a story of mine, we all know GameTheory
Love him to death but he isn’t the same guy as Cream
So he’s now hanged on a tree, I know his fate is funny."


BUT, I see you used multies here.

"But we all share this creepy dream, lucky I didn’t shred you
Don’t know where I’d fled to, blood and shit draws feds, dude
What would that have led too?"

So this shows you do have the ability to write multies, I guess it was a personal decision for some reason not too. But hey, multies aren't the only thing that matters. Your verse flowed well


Overall, a pretty solid drop. Good job guys, keep at it

The ending of these rhymes fall on the long e sound , just clarification. Thanks for the feed

[Sam.]

Hmm... this is interesting. First off, let me say I'm feeling the chorus

Zabe, you started strong, and I enjoyed the first couple bars a lot. From what I understood, you killed your gf's dad in the verse, yes? Quite funny haha

Sam, to me you started off kind of weak but picked it up about 4-6 bars in, and, from there on it was a killer verse. At one point you rhymed "sun-rise" over 10 times, good shit


Eminememy, your verse wasn't bad, but you could work on your multies. I didn't find any end rhymes with these lines.

"Now heres a story of mine, we all know GameTheory
Love him to death but he isn’t the same guy as Cream
So he’s now hanged on a tree, I know his fate is funny."


BUT, I see you used multies here.

"But we all share this creepy dream, lucky I didn’t shred you
Don’t know where I’d fled to, blood and shit draws feds, dude
What would that have led too?"

So this shows you do have the ability to write multies, I guess it was a personal decision for some reason not too. But hey, multies aren't the only thing that matters. Your verse flowed well


Overall, a pretty solid drop. Good job guys, keep at it

Thanks Man .
By now everyone has noticed the fuck up that I did while switching the Rhyme Scheme .